In today’s work environments, leaders face a challenge that is both timeless and urgent: building and sustaining trust. Without trust, even the best strategies and talent fall short—teams hesitate to share openly, innovation stalls, and collaboration weakens. Yet trust isn’t built in grand gestures or lofty mission statements. It’s earned in small, everyday interactions that signal to people: You matter; I see you.
That’s where leadership begins—not with authority, but with connection. The good news is, taking a step toward stronger trust doesn’t require complex tools or extra time. It can start with something as simple as shifting the way we check in with one another. In this blog, I share one small but powerful practice that any leader can use to build trust, strengthen connection, and make their presence felt in a meaningful way.
It’s just a few words, but I’ve found it to be one of the most powerful ways to connect with people, whether in the hallway in the office, on a virtual meeting, or out in the wild, in “real” life. It’s the simple question of: How’s your day going? Unlike the familiar, How are you?, which is so common it often fades into the background, this question usually gets a pause, a glance, and a genuine response. It stands out just enough to be noticed. And that small shift creates space—for honesty, connection, and sometimes even a smile.
As a leader, colleague, and human being moving through busy days like everyone else, I’ve come to treasure this question. It’s straightforward, open-ended, and adaptable. Someone can respond with, Good, thanks, and move on. Or they can take the invitation to share what’s on their mind—something they’re proud of, something that’s heavy, or something that simply needs a witness.
And here’s the real magic: when I ask the question with genuine interest, and actually listen to the answer, something shifts. People soften. Their posture changes. They feel seen. Not every response is profound or emotional—but almost everyone reminds me that we’re all carrying something, and sometimes all it takes to lighten that load is a moment of human connection.
The Subtle Power of the Question
How’s your day going? works because it’s specific enough to be felt in the moment. It doesn’t ask for someone’s life story or force them to evaluate how they’re doing overall. It invites presence—it asks about today―that alone is grounding. And because it’s not the usual script, people pay attention. They actually consider how their day is going, and often, they appreciate being asked.
What I’ve noticed over time is that most people don’t need a grand gesture or formal recognition to feel valued. They just need a brief moment where someone slows down and pays attention to them—not their title, not their output, but them.
Not Every Response Is Easy—and That’s Okay
Of course, not every interaction is seamless. Sometimes people overshare. Other times, they seem uncomfortable or uninterested. That’s all part of it. It’s actually great practice in holding space, managing boundaries, and staying curious, without needing to fix or control the conversation. And even if someone doesn’t engage fully, I still believe they walk away with the subtle reminder that someone cared enough to ask.
But far more often, what I receive is a smile. A visible lift. A moment of lightness or connection that didn’t exist just a moment earlier. And if I’m honest, it often brings me joy. These exchanges aren’t transactional—they’re human. And they’re a reminder that presence is powerful, no matter how brief.
The Leadership Impact
This practice has made me a better leader. Not because it builds strategic plans or drives outcomes, but because it builds trust—and trust is the foundation for everything else. When I ask people how their day is going and really listen, it communicates that they matter beyond their role. It encourages openness. It models curiosity. And it signals to the team that this is a place where people care about each other as people, not just producers.
Leadership isn’t only about what happens in formal settings—it’s also shaped in small, ordinary moments. These micro-interactions are often the ones people remember most. And when those moments are filled with authenticity, they quietly shape the culture.
A Small Practice With a Lasting Effect
I don’t ask the question out of habit—I ask it out of intention―because every time I do, I’m reminded that connection doesn’t require a lot of time, just a little attention.
So the next time you find yourself in a meeting, passing someone in the hallway, or opening a virtual 1:1, try asking, How’s your day going? Then pause. Be curious. Let the response be whatever it is. And see what opens up.
You might just find that a small question has a big impact—not only on the person you ask, but on how you lead, how you listen, and how you show up.
About the Author
Carrie Carpenter – Senior Director, Content and Partnership Development
Joining Signature Leaders in February of 2022, Carrie brings with her over a decade of learning and development experience, as well as a passion for fostering authentic, trusting business relationships. As Senior Director for Content and Partnership Development, Carrie drives content creation efforts at Signature Leaders for new offerings and alumni programs.
Prior to coming on board with Signature Leaders, Carrie most recently served in a variety of roles for the Sales Learning and Development team at Anthem Blue Cross and Blue Shield. Her responsibilities included managing a training team, leading training efforts for the Client Development and Client Management teams and coordinating and developing content for large-scale sales conferences and events. Carrie has a genuine enthusiasm and commitment toward championing others’ successes.
Carrie was born and raised in the greater Cincinnati area. She received her Bachelor of Arts in Psychology from Morehead State University and her Master of Science in Industrial/Organizational Psychology from Northern Kentucky University. Carrie is a holistic health enthusiast and enjoys time at the gym, cooking nutritious meals, and focusing on a mental and spiritual growth mindset. She also savors any opportunity to spend time with family and friends. Carrie is an amateur globetrotter, always seeking a new adventure and a chance to experience other cultures and cuisines. She enjoys being outdoors in the sunshine and is also an avid college football fan.
